DONKEY ROBOT

Please read these stuffy legal letters of threat sent to Swedish torrent technology company PirateBay. The threats are basically meaningless because they typically make reference to American, not Swedish, law. It’s questionable whether the threats are legitimate in the US too, but it’s unquestionable that the legal departments drafting these letters are major douchebags.

A snippet between Apple’s Legal Dept. and Pirate Bay :

> Apple is prepared to take further actions to stop the sites illegal
> activities, and Apple expressly reserves its rights. I am available
> to discuss this matter at any time. If you are represented by counsel
> in this matter, please provide me with the identity of that counsel.

Instead of simply recommending that you sodomize yourself with a
retractable baton, let me recommend a specific model - the ASP 21″. The
previous lawyers tried to use a cheaper brand, but it broke during the
action.

> This message and any attached documents contain information from the
> law firm of OMelveny & Myers LLP that may be confidential and/or
> privileged. If you are not the intended recipient, you may not read,
> copy, distribute, or use this information…

It’s OK with you that we post this message on http://static.thepiratebay.org/legal ? Because I just did, and I’m so
afraid of you and your nice titles and shiny offices :-(.

And that’s one of the tamer exchanges… http://static.thepiratebay.org/legal/